Augh, I have really been struggling for the last month and a half with my weight. Specifically since I reached Lifetime with Weight Watchers. It felt absolutely wonderful to have finally reached that point. I achieved the goal I have wanted for so long. It was also a huge “weight” off my shoulders. But I seem to have used it as an excuse to stop watching my weight as closely. I mean not entirely, but I have definitely floundered since then.
We went to Seattle right after I achieved lifetime membership and a lot of cheating ensued. That was expected and accepted because it was my celebratory vacation for all my hard work. But it seems like ever since we’ve been back, my diet and exercise regimes have still been on vacation. WHY!?
I know it’s a lifestyle change and not a diet. I know I can’t go back to the way I used to eat. I know I have to work out each day to maintain a healthy life. I just can’t bring my mindset back properly. My body and my head are not communicating properly together.
I DON’T want to gain my weight back. It’s such a huge accomplishment that I don’t want to just throw out the window.
I am finding myself making excuses to skip the gym. And when I finally do make it to the gym, I work out for 1/4 of the time I used to. I just can’t stay focused. I used to always make sure I have a book or some tv shows to watch and I still do that, but they just don’t keep my attention like they used to. I don’t understand it. It is definitely all in my mindset. I HAVE to get my head back in the game. I have to keep my lifetime membership and my weight loss accomplishments.
I am going for my first weigh in with WW on Tuesday since March 1 and since reaching lifetime. And I know I will be up at least 7lbs since my last weigh in. Which means that I have to pay again. Which means, that I “lose” my lifetime status until I am back within 2lbs of my goal weight. I am so embarrassed. My leader is going to be so disappointed in me. Hell, I am so disappointed in me. I have been stressing about it for the past month and a half and yet, I haven’t changed my bad habits. I am still eating poorly and working out poorly.
I’ve had plenty of time to lose that little bit of extra weight that I gained while in Seattle, but I just haven’t. And time is running out. There is no way I will lose that weight before April 30, what with Easter, my cooking classes and other events coming up in the next 2 weeks. So it’s time I face the music and own up to what I have done. I just hope that I will be able to properly get back on the wagon. AND STAY THERE. I don’t want this to happen again, month after month.
I think I just need to make sure I track my points in my journal and no matter what, weigh in once a week. Even though, with lifetime, I only need to weigh in once a month, I should do it every week. It’s a way to keep me on track and dependable. I am also going to ask my leader to check my points journal every week so that I have a good excuse to keep up with my tracking. There will be NO EXCUSES.
Another thing to work on is I have to stop making excuses for the gym and just GO!! I wish the weather was better outside so that I could do some more running and biking outside. That always makes me happy and energized. Unfortunately, it’s the middle of April and we are still getting snow. It makes me not want to exercise even more.
So I just need to adjust my attitude and everything should fall into place. It is going to be a battle for the next little while, but I am completely confident that I will make it back to the winning track.
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