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i'm in gryffindor! carolynne, female, seventeen, cancer, taken by peter, grade twelve, calgary, proud canadian, hyper, funny, talkative, movies, websites, queer as folk, harry potter, switchfoot, elijah wood

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It is with the sadness that we pass on the following news. Please join us in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects. They included Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemina delivered the eulogy and lovingly described doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.

Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he was regarded as a crusty old man who was considered a roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough -- they also had one in the oven -- and two children, John and Jane Dough. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

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