Dear Ezri baby,

You are half a year old! I can hardly believe it. The time has gone by so fast. I am so happy to be your Mom. You are the sweetest little girl with the brightest eyes.

Speaking of your eyes, they are just so big and beautiful. They are always the first thing people mention when they see you. Also that your eyelashes are amazingly long and perfect. I know many women would pay big bucks for eyelashes like yours. You definitely got those from your daddy.

You learned two things in one day this month! I turned my back on you for a second and you had figured out how to pull the tissues out of the Kleenex box. You had pulled about 10 out in no time flat. Clever girl. Then later that day, as you were playing on your play mat, you started to explore your voice in the form of screaming. It’s cute right now, but I am sure it will get louder and not as cute soon enough.

Part of me doesn’t even want to mention the sleep thing again. You just don’t seem to know how to sleep for long periods of time. To make things a tiny bit worse, now that you’ve learned how to roll over, you have started to sleep on your stomach. However, you sure don’t like it when you wake up and find yourself there. You get very upset and can’t compose yourself long enough to roll back over. When I see you in the monitor and you’ve just rolled to your tummy, I go in and roll you back to your back. By the time I get back into bed, you’ve already gone back to your tummy. It’s a fruitless job I suppose. But then WHY do you get so angry when you wake up on your tummy?? Nights have been a bit worse since you started this habit and I really didn’t think that could happen. Sigh. I guess it’s something that will be part of our life for the unforeseeable future. There are worse things in this world then having to get up in the middle of the night to settle you, my sweet little girl.

We gave you your first bit of formula this month in an effort to try to get you to sleep longer at night. All it did was make you extremely gassy and also made you act a bit funny. You weren’t your normal self. We’re assuming your tummy might have been a bit upset. We will try a different brand in a few days, maybe.

You’ve had tons of solids already. You love yams, pears and peaches the most. You don’t care at all for carrots, bananas, peas or wax beans. You have also tried apples, broccoli and squash. We are looking forward to trying some more “adventurous” foods in the upcoming month.

You really like your swimming lessons. You always splash around, kick your feet, suck on the toys and don’t mind being in the water at all. I’ve dunked you at least 15 times now and you seem okay with it. You are very good at not swallowing the water. I look forward to going each week with you.

You keeping lifting up your neck and head (as if you were trying to do a sit-up) when you are put down onto your back. It’s like you want to sit up but can’t quite make it all the way up. I am sure that will come sooner than your Daddy and I would like. You’re growing and advancing so fast. I’m trying to take in as much as I can every single day.

You really are becoming your own little person Ezri. Your adorable personality makes me weak at the knees. You’re just so darn cute. I don’t know what I’ll do with you as you just continue to get cuter with each passing day.

Love you FOREVER!

Your Mommy

Previous letters: 1 month, 2 months, 3 months, 4 months, 5 months

My Mom and I rejoined Weight Watchers a couple weeks ago. I hadn’t intended to join the program again, but the scale just kept going up in the wrong direction, so I had to do something. They were having a promotion where you pay for 3 months and you get 3 more months free. After signing up, we also found out that if we lose 10lbs in the first 2 months, then we get our money back for those months. So if we succeed in losing the 10lbs, we will essentially get 6 months of meetings for the price of 1 month. That is a nice way to motivate me! After my second weigh in, I am 5.7lbs down, so well on the way to 10lbs!

Ezri is still not sleeping very well. I find that I am not so much physically tired as my body has become accustomed to the sparse amount of sleep we’re getting. The problem is that it is starting to wear on me emotionally. I never know if I’m going to wake up and have breakdowns all day or not. It’s tough, probably one of the toughest things I’ve been through as a parent thus far. I am still so happy to be a Mom though and every time Ezri smiles or makes a cute noise, I melt into a puddle. Nothing else matters in those moments!!

In effort to try to get Ezri to sleep longer, Peter and I started something a little different on Sunday night by giving Ezri a full bottle of breast milk right before bed. That way we make sure that she is getting a full feed before she goes down for the night. It worked Sunday night by almost giving us a 5 hour stretch, but we were back to 2-3 hours last night. We’re still hoping it will work again tonight. If this new routine does end up working, then we will definitely continue each night. However, I cannot pump enough milk to keep up with the amount of milk needed. So we might need to supplement with formula. I will be talking to a lactation consultant tomorrow when I get Ezri weighed.

Swimming lessons are going pretty well. Ezri seems to love the water. We practised floating last week and she was kicking her legs like mad. I think we are doing dunking this week, so that will be a little scary, but I know we can do it. After the lessons, Ezri is so exhausted that she’s usually asleep before we even reach the car!! Plus, those naps tend to be a bit longer, and in Ezri language, that means 45-60 minutes!! Ahhh, it’s wonderful. Wish I could poop her out like that more often.

Peter, Ezri and I went to the Calgary Comic Expo on the weekend. It was fun, but it was also the usual, as per previous years. Going once a year will definitely be enough for us!! It was SO super crowed this year. Maybe it’s because we had Ezri with us, but I just had so much anxiety with the enormous amount of people. I think I was worried about people bumping into and hurting Ezri. Anyway, she did very well. Had a snooze on her first train ride there and then woke up as we were exploring the exhibitors. She hung out in the stroller and managed to throw all her toys on the ground so she didn’t have any clean ones left by the end of it. We stopped halfway through for a feeding and I wore her in the wrap for the remaining time. She fell asleep on the way home again and woke up as we were having sushi for supper. Hopefully next year we will coordinate family costumes! Each year we talk about having matching outfits, but we never get around to it. Maybe with Ezri, we will have more motivation! Here is a picture of Ezri and I and some awesome cosplay characters from The Nightmare Before Christmas!!

At least our final show was a great one! We saw The Book of Mormon! We were lucky enough to see this show in Toronto 2.5 years ago, but it’s so good that we were delighted to see it again. It was just as great as the first time. Actually, scratch that, it was better, for two reasons. First, our seats were better. In Toronto we sat separately in the 2nd and 3rd row on the left side of the theatre. So we really couldn’t beat the front row centre seats we had on Sunday!! Second, the actors were better. They played the characters perfectly. I fully believed they were their roles. Plus, I recognized one of the actors from some Team Starkid musicals that I love!!! AJ Holmes starred in shows such as A Very Potter Musical and Twisted! It was very cool to see someone who started their career on YouTube as a Starkid on a national Broadway tour!!

If there is a show that comes to Calgary that we absolutely MUST see, then we will probably buy individual tickets for that show only. Also, who knows, maybe if future seasons are more interesting, we might buy season tickets again! Hoping to get the best possible seat, of course. I’m sad for now, but I accept it’s for the better!

Dear baby girl Ezri,

As each day goes by, I fall more and more in love with you. Your little personality is growing by leaps and bounds. You are becoming quite an amazing little girl. This month was definitely the most exciting in terms of new developments and milestones! Where to begin?!

The sweetest sounds have started coming out of your lips as you’re learning to giggle. You are becoming so interactive with your Dad and I. We do fun little things to make you laugh and you actually do! You love when I blow raspberries on your tummy and sides during a diaper change. You love the sound of your daddy’s fake sneezes. You are more smiley than ever and more and more often those smiles are accompanied by giggles. It is such a joy to watch you become interested in people and things around you. You love to play with toys now and everything you touch has to go into your mouth. You suck on everything you possibly can.

We moved you into your crib this month. You are now sleeping in your very own room, albeit not very well. We hadn’t set out a date to move you and one night just decided it was time, spur of the moment. You slept pretty well the first few nights in your own crib, but then came time for your 4 month immunizations. After your shots, you had a mild fever for 2 days. Ever since then, you haven’t slept longer than a stretch of 3 hours. You have been waking up every 1-2 hours after your “longer” stretch of 3 hours. I will be honest, it’s been DREADFUL. The only thing that settles you back into sleep is nursing. So I have been up 4-10 times a night for almost a month. Your Dad and I were walking zombies for a couple weeks, but I think our bodies have adjusted to the lack of sleep. Each night we go to sleep hoping it’ll be the night you magically sleep 4+ hours in a row. Sadly, we are still waiting. I met with a sleep expert, along with our baby group, and she gave me some great information. Your Daddy and I are now working at helping you learn to fall asleep on your own and without your soother! It is tough because I worked so hard to get you to like your soother! All good things must come to an end, I suppose. I am sure you will remember that you actually like sleep and will get back into some good habits soon. Please???

On a better note, you learned how to roll over this month!! It is so amazing to put you down for a second only to come back and see you in a different place! You started rolling from your front to your back first, but after about a week, you got bored with that and started going from back to front too. Your arm sometimes gets in the way, but you make it past it eventually. You tend to get stuck on your tummy, but I know you know how to roll back to your back, so I usually let you figure it out. Your Dad and I will have to start baby proofing pretty soon because you will be more and more mobile before we know it.

At your 4 month immunization appointment, we were told that you had fallen below the “normal baby” weight percentile curve. You had previously been on the low end of it in the 3rd percentile, but shifted a little lower. You hadn’t lost any weight, but the nurse didn’t think you were gaining an appropriate amount of weight. After speaking with a couple different nurses and lactation consultants, it has been decided that you are doing just fine. You are gaining weight at a steady rate and you are creating your own little weight curve. You’re just petite and need to go at your own pace. Nevertheless, I am taking you every week to be weighed with a lactation consultant and we are keeping an eye on your progress. We are also going to see the doctor next week just as a precaution. However, nothing to be concerned about at this time. Your last recorded weight was 10lbs 15oz!

We fed you your first solids this month. We gave you a bit of rice cereal and you didn’t like it at first, but I think you’re getting used to it now. You are figuring out the spoon and how it works a little more each time we try. You actually like to lick the spoon now! Last night you ate all of the rice cereal I had prepared for you, so I think you’re beginning to enjoy it a bit. Your Daddy and I tried to feed you carrot a couple times this past week as well. You don’t seem to like it at all. You shudder each time and you even gagged once. So we are going to lay off it for a bit and just stick with the rice cereal. You are still pretty young to be eating solids anyway.

Your screaming and crying in the car continues. I have come to accept the fact that you don’t like to ride in any moving vehicle. It puzzles me still, but I’ve given up on what could be the reason. Instead, I have found a solution to keep you 100% happy in the car: a portable DVD player. If I play a movie for you while we drive, you don’t make a peep. Your eyes are glued to the screen the whole time (except when you sometimes fall asleep). I realize I shouldn’t be allowing you to watch movies at such a young age, but it is for my sanity and yours. I don’t dread having to go out anymore and I am sure you are happier not to be screaming. For shorter trips, I don’t put the DVD player on, in hopes that you might get used to riding without it. You still whimper and cry. Oh well. I’m hoping the DVD player is a temporary solution.

When you were in the hospital in the NICU in your first week of life, the nurses had to shave a bit of your hair so they could put an IV in. It was just a little spot right above your left ear, but it has taken forever to grow back. I am proud to say that it has finally grown in! Your new hair has covered most of the area and I can no longer see where they shaved you. Only took 5 months! Haha.

Another great thing that happened this month is that you found your feet! You first found your right foot with your right hand. Then it found your left foot as well. Your left hand finally started to catch up about a week after your right. A fw days later, you began to put your feet into your mouth and suck on them. Now it is your favourite thing to do. The material on your sleepers are usually soaked through with saliva at your feet. I am getting used to carrying around a human pretzel as you are now always holding or sucking on your feet. I am amazed at how flexible babies are!

We started taking swimming lessons this month! You’ve only had one lesson so far and I’m not sure you knew what to think of it. You didn’t splash around like you do at bath time, but you seemed to enjoy it a little bit. You cried near the end of the class for a couple minutes, but overall, I think you enjoyed most of the 30 minute class. Your Grandma came to watch the lesson as well and I think she will try to come as often as her schedule allows. Anyway, I am looking forward to the next 10 weeks worth of swimming lessons with you!!

This month had so many exciting things happen and I am so looking forward to next month as well (hopefully with a bit more sleep along the way)!

Love Mommy

Previous letters: 1 month, 2 months, 3 months, 4 months

When we got pregnant, we were fully aware that sleep was going to be hard to come by for awhile. We expected to lose out on precious sleep. However, it is one of the hardest adjustments we’ve had to make. Ezri is “going through a phase” right now where she is very anti-sleep. It is absolutely exhausting. She slept pretty well for the first couple months of her life, then she sort of forgot how to sleep.

As a newborn, she would have stretches of sleep anywhere from 2-7 hours. It was great some nights and so-so other nights. But at least we’d still have a long stretch every now and then. Then she started sleeping only a maximum of 4 hours for her long stretch, which isn’t too bad either because she would sleep for another 3 hour stretch afterward. Now, it is extremely rare for her to go a full 3 hours at a time, even for her “long stretch.”

For the past 2.5 weeks, I’ve been getting up with Ezri 3-10 times a night. That is from 8pm-8am. Peter has been getting up a few times as well, but of course I’m awake longer because I have to nurse her. She doesn’t necessarily need to nurse each time she wakes up, but she can’t seem to fall back to sleep on her own lately. She used to be able to, I swear. So we put the soother in or rock her and she sleeps for 45 minutes to 1.5 hours and then is up again. She seems to sleep a bit better when she is in bed with us. It may not be the safest way to sleep, but at this point I don’t care. Sleep is sleep. I just don’t want her to get into the habit of sleeping in our bed.

I really don’t get why she is hating sleep. It is definitely starting to wear on Peter and I. Today, I dozed in and out on Ezri’s floor while she napped in her crib. I didn’t care how how uncomfortable or cold it was. It didn’t matter. I was/am so tired. At least I got a teeny ounce of sleep, I suppose. 

I am looking for things to explain this sudden hate of sleep and one huge thing comes to mind. Coincidently, she had her 4 month immunizations 2.5 weeks ago and that is exactly when she started sleeping poorly. Also, to note, she started hating riding in the car right after she had her 2 month immunizations. Now I am very supportive of vaccinating our kids because I think it helps protect them and everyone around them. However, I am starting to really wonder about the side effects. Seriously, is it just coincidence that these changes in behaviour are happening right after Ezri has her shots? Or could it actually be caused by the shots??? I really can’t think of any other explanation at the moment. Of course, it’s some-what hard for my sleep deprived brain to think anyway.

Anyway, long story not so short, I am very tired and I really, really hope Ezri starts sleeping well again soon. Oh and she’s a little bit of a tricky monster too. Let me explain: she won’t sleep at night when Peter and I want her to sleep, but when we have to get up in the morning because we have something to do, she doesn’t want to wake up. I took this photo this morning when I was trying to wake her up as we had to go out. She just kept on looking cute and sleeping. Argh, I’m never going to win!!

I was talking to my friend today and it turns out that her Papa’s last sibling passed away yesterday. Her Papa passed away about 10 years ago and his sister was the last remaining link my friend had to her Papa. So needless to say, she was a little upset today. It made me think about my Grandma and how she is my last Grandparent. She’s in her late eighties and I know she’s not going to be around forever. I love her so much and we see each other about once a week.

Anyway, as I was talking with my friend and thinking about my Grandma, my Mom called and said that Grandma was in ER at the Hospital. It was so scary that this news came at that exact moment.

It turns out she dropped a TV table on her leg and it was enormously swollen and bruised. The bruise is about 9 inches long and swollen 3 inches high. Thank goodness that she is already back home now. My Mom is going to stay the night with her and make sure she gets everything she needs.

I’m so greatful that nothing worse happened to her. It’s just so scary that things like that can happen and change everything in a second. I hope her recovery goes well!

On a lighter note, I have a new favourite picture. It was St. Patrick’s Day yesterday so Ezri and I wore green with our matching Mike Wazowski outfits! LOVE IT!!!

Anyway, I’ve also found that it has sparked my cooking interest. I’ve made quite a few new recipes in the past couple weeks. It’s a good thing because Peter and I were falling back into the habit of grabbing fast food for supper. Bad on the wallet and the hips. 

A couple of the new recipes have been winners that I’d make again, but couple are one timers.  

I made Gordon Ramsey’s Red Mullet and sweet chilli sauce. I subbed in haddock because that’s what I had in the freezer. The peanut coating didn’t stay on the fish too well, but the chili sauce was fantastic. I will definitely make the sauce again. It paired so well with the fish. I didn’t take a picture because the fish looked so bad with the coating coming off. Anyway, I even bought a mortar and pestle because Gordon “told” me to. Apparently it’s an essential kitchen tool. Haha, I’ll have to start grinding some spices and dressings. 

I made Rachael Ray’s Riggies with charred tomatoes, sausage, kale and ricotta and it was fantastic. It will definitely be coming into our regular rotation. I took more liberties with this one because of what I had in hand. I used penne instead of rigatoni, zinfandel wine instead of dry sherry, onion instead of shallot, turkey sausage instead of pork and baby spinach instead of kale. So delicious.

Finally I made Jamie Oliver’s Pukka yellow curry. After I made the curry paste I realized it was much too spicy for our household. So when I put everything on to cook, I added the juice of a lemon and a can of tomato sauce instead of the water. It cut the spice down greatly, but this one was not a favourite. I won’t be making it again. Maybe I’m just not a fan of curry unless it has coconut milk in it. Who knows. Peter didn’t like the chickpeas in it, but I did. 

Then I tried Roger Mooking’s Miso marinated ribs. The recipe called for a lot more orange than I put into it because I really didn’t want the miso flavour to be hidden. Well maybe I should have put more orange in because the final product was super salty. My tummy hurt afterward. Also, in a stupid move on my part, I opted to bbq the ribs instead of baking. Well the sauce basically just burned right away so most of the outside of the rib was black and inedible. Gross. Won’t be making these again because I figured out I prefer bbq sauce on ribs. No picture because the ribs were so badly burned. 

I wanted to make another one of Rachael Ray’s recipes this weekend, Penne alla Senese, however, I never did. Peter was sick with the stomach flu and I have a cold so our household was not feeling 100%. I’m hoping to make it sometime this week as I have all the ingredients in the fridge. 

I don’t have anything else planned, so I better watch some more cooking shows to get some more recipes! 

I thought it was a pretty good deal. Plus, 6 months is a fair amount of time to try a new product out! Also, our ISP has done away with their 30 day cancellation notice. So if we want to, we can cancel the day before 6 months is up with no penalty. That was my initial plan because I seriously didn’t believe we would want to keep the cable or phone.

However now that we’ve had the cable for a week, I seriously don’t know if I’ll want to give it up. I’ve literally sat on the couch for the past week watching TV. Although really, I’m only watching the food network. Oh and a show called border security. And Dragons Den and Rachel Ray. Ugh. Okay I need a life. I even talked our ISP into providing us with a free PVR so we can record shows. So I’m recording so many and am able to skip all the commercials. That’s one of the reasons I hate cable is because of the commercials. Problem solved!!!

The home phone however is utterly useless. We are so used to using our cell phones for everything that we don’t need the land line. I’ve given the number to my Mom and that’s about it. Haha. It might come in handy if we have to call long distance anywhere, but that does not happen very often. So it will definitely go at the end of the 6 months.

I might eventually get tired of watching the food network, but for now I love it!! I feel sorry for our poor Netflix account. No actually, Peter still watches it everyday so no worries!

Dear Ezri,

You are the light of my life. Who knew there could be so much love in this world? You grow more and more each day. As much as I want you to grow and develop, I already miss the little newborn I held in my arms only 3 short months ago. I will probably say this in every letter I write to you, but it has to be said again: time is flying by so fast.

You’re my growing girl! I am so impressed with how strong and big you’re getting. Your neck muscles are super strong!! Size wise, You are still wearing newborn diapers, but not for too much longer. We will finish our current box and then move you up to size 1. Sad, but also cheaper because more size 1’s come in a box than newborns! We’ve also officially retired most of your newborn outfits. You are in 0-3 month outfits and they fit pretty well. However there is still some room to grow in them for a couple months, I’m sure!

You’ve begun to drool A LOT!! One day you soaked through 2 outfits before I was smart enough to start putting a bib around your neck! Who knew the drooling would start so early?! I can only imagine what it will be like when you are teething.

Your little excess piece of umbilical cord, that just didn’t want to detach, finally let go. It had worried us and lead to your first trip to urgent care in your second month. However, it was nothing to stress about. Your belly button is healing nice and is probably set the way it will look like the rest of your life. You have a cute little innie button.

You have not officially rolled over yet, but your Dad and I can tell that you really want to! You have half rolled over from your back to your front about 4 times, but you just can’t figure out how to get past your arm. It’s always in the way. We are hoping you will figure it out sooner or later. We propped you on your stomach and arms and you rolled to your back 3 times, but really we think you just fell over 3 times. It doesn’t count as officially rolling over! Keep up the good work and I am sure you will figure out where to put your arms soon enough to actually roll.

You “slept through the night” for the very first time!!! Previously, your longest recorded sleep was 6.5 hours. This time, you were asleep for 8 continuous hours!!! I couldn’t believe it. I woke up 3 times during that time because I was so used to getting up more often. You just kept on snoozing, so I let you do your thing and it was wonderful! It has only happened once, but I am hopeful for the future!! You are also now sleeping in your cradle every night. There is no more fighting to get you down and out of my arms. You may wake up a little bit at first, but if I put the soother in your mouth and keep my hand on your chest a bit, you drift back off to sleep. Good girl!! Speaking of sleep, you are also napping a bit better during the day out of my arms! We are getting you to sleep in the playpen and you seem to be fine with it.

It is very unfortunate, but you have started to HATE driving in the car. As soon as I start backing out of the driveway, you start to cry. Then you continue to scream and cry the whole journey. If you can keep it in, you seem to be okay while sucking on your soother. However, you always drop it out of your mouth and that makes you sad. I stop the car to put it back in, but as soon as I’m driving again, it’s out and you’re crying again. Even if someone is sitting in the back with you, you are still upset. Why?! You used to love car rides so much and would fall asleep almost immediately. Your daddy and I have tried so many things to try to make you happy. We are stumped. Our next step is to probably buy this mirror because you love lights and we’re hoping it will help. If that doesn’t work, then we may never leave the house again. Not really, but it certainly stresses me out each time. It hurts my heart to hear you scream and cry when I can’t soothe you.

This was the month that I had to take you for your immunizations. I even had to have an updated shot as well. I definitely took them harder than you did because I didn’t know if you would have any reactions after the shots. Luckily you were a trooper. You cried after you got poked, but then you nursed right away and calmed down. You did not get a fever or anything so we didn’t have to give you tylenol. Still, your mama is not looking forward to the next set of vaccinations.

Daddy had to go away for 5 days this month to Orlando for a business trip. It was tough on me being a “single Mom” for a few days, but we survived. There were some tears and ups and downs, but we made it. Boy are we ever lucky to have your Daddy around! Your Grandma and Grandpa also went away this month and you only got to see them for a few days. You made sure to smile lots for pictures so we could send some to them. You even sang Happy Birthday with me in a video that we sent to Grandpa on his birthday. He loved it so much. They missed you a lot while they were gone!

You got to meet your Great Aunt and Uncle and two Cousins that came for a visit from Ontario. They sang lots of fun little songs for you and you smiled lots for them. They made some delicious meals for the freezer as well. We are so lucky to have such a wonderful family!

We had a couple get togethers with your friends from our baby classes! It was great to see all the babies and find out how everyone was doing. Despite being the oldest of the group, you are definitely the smallest baby!

Please continue to be the cutest and best daughter in the world!!

Love your Mama

Previous letters: 1 month, 2 months